A day underground...

Suffice it to say that wandering into a random school... absolutely knowing no one, having only a taped message telling me where and when to report... is a challenge most would admit to. I however think (in retrospect) it was like a child experiencing a complex and not so pleasant situation for the very first time: I had absolutely no experience or apriori knowledge... so let's just say I was very naiive.

Prior to this 'adventure', I did have plenty of experience with BEING a STUDENT, a TEACHER, a MEMBER OF A LEARNING COMMUNITY... in a number of situations, schools and places. And in all, I was always generally treated as part of a community of purpose driven learners/teachers/helpers...

Here's the thing: a sub in NYC is scarcely noticed either way. Expectations are so low; it's positively unnecessary to be or say anything particularly. It is about showing up at the allotted time, receiving a paper with attendance forms that need to be filed with student's names that you will not know (now, picture taking attendance in a foreign school with kids who do not necessarily want or care if you know they are there!), punching a card that is eerily the same as ones I remember from my mother's generation as a teacher here in New York City, and whatever else falls in between that time is just a bonus(?).

That first day though, and all other (sub)sequent ..ahh a pun.... I march in, greet and say hello to each and every person passing me in the hall, stairwell or anywhere else and EVEN though in many many instances I am barely acknowledged by other adults in these schools (am I invisible in this scenario? I wonder often), I find myself daily trying to just connect on a basic level. To the school administrator who's job it is to make sure there is indeed an adult (licensed) body in every class, I always smile, show them my letter, license... and in case it is a school actually seeking an excellent teacher, I pass them my c.v as well.

So to sum up :
*I get an assignment on the 'subcentral' system, by phone call, and rarely any other notification or information than from a prerecorded message.
*I present myself, professionally, on time, punch in, receive my assignment and...
*Goto Class(es) as listed on my schedule

Now, clearly I have yet to elaborate on the latter part .. the one where I actually show up at the door of a classroom and am expected to teach. That part will have to wait while I catch the reader up on the other, preliminary parts of the substitute-in-nyc scenario ... except to say that I have had ample opportunity whilst 'experiencing' subbing...as it's called... to ask myself the following:

Question "Is not teaching and the profession about connecting with students and others engaged in the educational process??" I can chuckle though, and while I acknowledge that to date I have had, met, and taught alongside of some very very excellent and engaged teachers, AS A SUB IT IS PRACTICALLY A NONEXISTANT EXPERIENCE. If anyone speaks to me, it is almost completely initially without any expectation whatsoever. Often I find that when I do have a moment with some of the adults (and even with some of the students), there is a calculable instant when each notices, "hey, she is a mature, articulate and educated teacher.."... and I have come to think how wierd it is that the surprise is that I AM qualified, experienced and not a total incompetent idiot!! Really.

As a Sub, I am essentially the no body walking in the halls with the blue attendance folder.. the folder that appears to be more important than the work that I may or may not be able to accomplish in any given day, filling in for a teacher I will probably never meet and who will most probably never care to meet me or if he/she does...

Leaving off now with an example of meeting one such teacher that is amusing: when, arriving back later that same day to her room where I was 'substitute teaching' for a group of aproximately 20 9th and 10th grade students...ALL of whom were there with me on detention (a detail which no adult felt necessary to fill me in at days' start) while the rest of the classes went for a trip, the teacher made the following remark as I headed out:

"I'm really impressed", she said quietly and smiling, and continued with, "usually, when I come back here after there has been a substitute teacher, all the chairs and tables are thrown around and paper and books are everywhere"...all said as calmly as you or I may mention to someone how nicely someone's new boots or coat are that they are wearing...

As I said, expectations for the 'sub' is, well, set 'sub'standard, all in all.